"CATCH YOU FUCKERS AT A BAD TIME?"

Christmas

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  • Hey bud, thanks for reading.

    Don't feel obligated, but here are some

  • WAYS YOU CAN SUPPORT THE SHIT OUT OF VERN & OUTLAWVERN.COM

    if that's your thing:

  • 1. Patreon

    Toss me a couple bucks a month, support the good shit, also get access to a bunch of exclusive writing. This is my primary source of writing money that has allowed me to cut down to part time at the day job. Thank you!

  • 2. Buy my books from your local bookseller or somebody

    click here for my Amazon author page

    (NOTE: My ten year contract has passed on the Titan books, so I don't get residuals on them like I do WORM ON A HOOK and NIKETOWN, but I would love for you to read them because I'm proud of them)

    EXTRA CREDIT: Review them on Amazon! That would really help me out. Unless you didn't like them, in which case forget I said anything.

  • 3. If you ever buy from Amazon, go through my links or search engines



    (you pay the same amount you were gonna pay anyway they cut me a little slice)

  • I also have an Amazon UK one:

    (I can't get the search box widget to work anymore, so click on MOONWALKER and then search for what you want.)

  • 4. My exciting line of fashion and leisure products

    (I get a couple bucks per item, you get a cool t-shirt, mug or lifestyle item)

  • 5. Spread the word

    Tell your friends about my reviews and my books and everything. Only cool people though please, we don't need a bunch of suckers and/or chumps around here.

    THANKS EVERYBODY. YOUR FRIEND, VERN

    * * * *

  • Recent commentary and jibber-jabber

    • Alex R on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Majestyk, I was also thinking of Shrek as the point most of this meta winking stuff draws from now. Whedon…” Jun 8, 18:37
    • Zed on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I was the right age for MOTU, but it was never really my thing. That said, on 2026 I’d see…” Jun 8, 16:44
    • Crudnasty on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I had a Castle Greyskull playset and a battle damage He-Man with a Battle Cat figure (that shit was cool…” Jun 8, 16:37
    • Curt on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I will further expand on my “it’s funny because it’s a cheesy toy” theory of humor: It worked in BARBIE…” Jun 8, 15:41
    • Mr. Majestyk on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Whedon gets a lot of blame for the snarkification of sci-fi-fantasy cinema, but I think it’s a case of his…” Jun 8, 15:14
    • Tim Bobo on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I feel like the success of Guardians of the Galaxy has sort of ruined the old school straight forward adventure/fantasy…” Jun 8, 14:48
    • Curt on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I just had another theory about this movie: It might be trying to emulate the type of jokes in BARBIE…” Jun 8, 14:34
    • Dooley the Gravedigger on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Ironic snark wasn’t really a thing with all the 80’s movies we grew up on, then Whedon and Marvel had…” Jun 8, 14:18
    • Alex R on Masters of the Universe (2026): “The Travis Knight “one of the most unusual nepo babies” thing Vern brings up here is something I’ve thought a…” Jun 8, 12:18
    • Aktion Figure on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Stray thought but the way you describe this flick calls to mind Tsui Hark era HK fantasy; totally broad, much…” Jun 8, 12:01
    • Curt on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Vern, that closing joke in the movie definitely made me think of the times you’ve called out similar jokes in…” Jun 8, 10:27
    • Tim Bobo on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Was never really a He Man fan to be honest, so I’ll wait for streaming. Hollywood, give me that Thundaar…” Jun 8, 09:31
    • CJ Holden on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Yeah, I will still watch that thing one day, but when I heard about all those “Haha, these guys have…” Jun 8, 08:57
    • Ryan on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I can’t believe it’s 141 minutes long. Lemme re-edit it to a cool 90 mins that cuts out all the…” Jun 8, 08:25
    • Andrew on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I went into this, despite knowing very little about HE-MAN, because I was bored after a shift, and SCARY MOVIE…” Jun 8, 08:19

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